From @arospecawarenessweek‘s prompts:
Write about your discovery of aromanticism. That can include finding out about the term, realizing you were aromantic or on the aromantic spectrum, or anything else about the terms, community, or anything else relevant to your experiences. Definitely feel free to include feelings or experiences that helped your identification.
Discovering asexuality was the doorway to finding out other sides of my identity. I live in a very conservative area so I was always under the impression that you only had two options, gay or straight (or variations thereof). I didn’t know there was a “none of the above” option. Then the ace community talked about romantic attraction and I had to think really long and really hard about whether or not I really was aromantic. What made me hesitate was the fact that I LOOOOVE to read soppy, trashy, brain-bleach-worthy fanfiction. I thought “well, I like to read all this lovedovey stuff…” then I couldn’t really be aro. I didn’t think any of it was at all accurate of what romance actually felt like so I just kept waiting. It took several affirmations about how what I like to read doesn’t reflect on what I am and I had to stop listing to people who kept telling me I just “hadn’t met the right one yet” over and over and over. I took the slow route to sort out my feelings before deciding that, yes, I was aromantic. There was only time that I ever had that “I want to date you” feeling towards somebody and the sequential heartache that came with it not working out. I was 23 at the time and that was the only isolated incident in my life time. I don’t want people to use that single incident as an argument against my identity or an excuse to say I’m damaged or proof that the “right one” exists. I’ve fully accepted my identity as aromantic and asexual and I take pride in the many facets that make up who I am.